Birth plans are very common among expecting moms. Most of us have a desire for how we want our birth to go but I know as well as anyone that sometimes those plans don’t work out. I’ve been let down and cried many tears over not having the birth experience that I wanted. I want to disclaimer my post right now by saying that OF COURSE my top priority is healthy baby, healthy mom. Obviously we all just want our bundles of joy here safely. Period. I had incredible births, all perfect in their own way even if they weren’t my definition of perfect or what I had ‘planned’. That doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t have an idea of how we want to do things though. I’m a huge believer in positive birth affirmations. More so with each baby that I’ve had. Even if plans go astray, a positive mind set is most of the battle. For this pregnancy I have done a lot of praying, willing, and faith keeping in the outcome. I’ve watched things fall into place one tiny step at a time. From my placenta previa resolving itself to many midwives falling through just so the one that I wanted the most could end up working out in the end. Long story short, I picked her. Loved her. Clicked with her. Had no doubts about her. Then she realized that she was booked full for my birth month and we had somehow missed it. I was so crushed. No other midwives compared after we met her. I felt defeated and like maybe I wasn’t meant to birth at home. Through this entire journey I have consistently prayed that if I wasn’t supposed to have a safe and successful home birth, please don’t let anything work out. Don’t let us even make it to the first prenatal appointment with a midwife. Take this desire away from me and make it clear that this isn’t your plan for me. I eventually took a step back and stopped looking for midwives all together. I was to the point where I began to believe that He was telling me what I didn’t want to hear when I got the call: “Hey girl, I had a few ladies risk out of my care this week that are all due in December and now I can take you on as a patient if you’re still interested!”. I cried. Big time. From that point on all doubt was just gone and I put everything into having relentless faith that this was what my future held. I haven’t wavered from that. I deeply believe in my birth plan and my ability to carry this baby to term. With that said, here are my personal birth plans/desires & affirmations for this baby: <At the end I’ll include basic labor affirmations too for those of you looking for positive labor quotes that fit all types of labor so if you’re just here for those hop down to the *** .>
What I want/imagine for this delivery is very specific and again, I am FULLY aware that things don’t always work out but until that happens, I will hold tight to my belief that I WILL GET MY DREAM BIRTH!
Pre labor plans/prep:
As a big family that seems to always have someone hungry at any given time, I keep my home stocked up on snacks, drinks, fruits, ect. that will help with general hospitality for my birth team but I’d love to have enough heads up in labor that I can put on a slow cooker meal. I’m going to freeze several of them for after the birth but for actual labor I want to do a big fresh crock pot meal to eat on. Soup, stew, chicken and dumplings, something like that. My husband is a bomb cook so if things get crazy, I may just let him toss it on himself. Super low maintenance and very convenient. I also would love to have a sandwich tray and a fruit/cheese tray for everyone to snack on not just during labor but for a day or so afterwards. That will all just depend on how much time i have in early labor, of course. There’s a chance that if I can’t do those things, my mom can. If not though, it’s not going to be something that stresses me out. Staying stocked up on groceries will be good enough. I also always keep throw blankets and pillows easily available. We are ‘blankey’ junkies. We love them so we have a ton of them. We are naturally big into entertaining so I feel like we have that going for us in the hospitality department. I’m not overly focused on those things because they are just a given which is nice. Cleaning supplies, heavy duty trash bags, clean towels, disposable plates/bowels/silverware, Ect are something else that I’ll be mindful of keeping well stocked.
Birth setting/atmosphere:
I pour faith into having a low lit night time water birth in front of the Christmas tree so that when my younger children wake up their baby brother is here. My oldest daughters really want to watch the birth and as long as it’s a smooth delivery and they still feel this strongly about being there for it, I will most likely wake them up. In general though, laboring while the younger two sleep is ideal. Plus my home after dark during Christmas time is the happiest vibe ever to me. Truly. It’s everything and so peaceful. I want to have the home full of comfortable scents diffusing and just radiate an over all healing heaven ha. I obviously have activities to help preoccupy the kids if it’s a day birth though. Their play room is full of toys and craft supplies. I’m going to buy stuff to bake Christmas cookies and goodies. Stuff like that.
I pray for a intimate labor process in my cozy space but I also have always been that girl who wanted my loved ones there pretty much right away. We all joke that me giving birth is like a party. I enjoy alone time the night following the birth but during the day when the excitement is brand new i LOVE having company to share the joy with. A dreamy Christmas tree lit birth followed by a day of close family coming to visit is what I pray and hope for. Specific, I know. But there’s no harm in having those goals.
I imagine my husband helping my daughters deliver the baby. I imagine my birth team (two midwives, a midwife student, a photographer, and a doula), my husband, our older girls, my mom, and my mother in law there for the birth.
I imagine a peaceful labor with no issues or scares. I don’t even pray for a fast or painless labor. I can handle long periods of natural labor. I had prodromal labor with all 4 of my babies. I just pray for a medically uneventful labor with no hiccups. No concerns.
I pray very hard that I have enough time to get my birth team all here. Most of them live an hour and a half away (Tulsa) so this is something that I really worry about. For me, I can contract regularly for weeks and dilate up to a 5 but not be in active labor. It’s very hard to tell before transition when I’m in real deal labor and once transition hits, I’ve always had a baby within 45 minutes. Literally. All four times. I transition super fast but pre labor super long. A gradual dilation and labor this time would be incredible just so everyone can get here. Not only that but I’m also due in December so weather could delay arrival too.
I pray that the baby and I have a great nursing experience right away. That he latches with ease and that my toddler doesn’t have any dramatic jealousy issues. I want a calm tandem nursing relationship.
I pray that Granger is in flawless health and thrives immediately.
I pray that I don’t have any heavy bleeding this time and avoid hemorrhage scares. I want a smooth, healing night at home without fear.
Actual birth plans:
They are not typical for a hospital birth because with a home birth there’s no epidurals, no instant vaccinations, no instant bath, delayed cord clamping is typical, natural expulsion of the placenta is also typical, ect. All of those natural based plans that you have to clarify for a hospital birth — are the standard plans for a home birth which is why home birth was originally so appealing to me. No pressure to do things in a way that doesn’t fit your lifestyle. No pressure to induce. No pressure for unnecessary intervention.
I plan to do a herbal bath while the cord is still attached to the placenta. We are preserving my placenta to have it encapsulated but I’ve seen some women place theirs in a bowel that floats in the birth tub full of healing herbs while it’s still attached to the baby and I love that idea to help jump start the healing process. The sentiment of it is also very appealing to me. Cherishing those last moments before that 9 month long life line is severed. I’d like to cut the cord myself this time.
I plan to clean myself up and get baby dressed at our own leisure while the rest of my company/birth team tends to other things such as the birth clean up and my children. Brian wants to have skin to skin with Granger while I get out of my wet clothes and shower. The midwives plan is to have the living room/birthing area all cleaned up by the time that I’m cleaned up too that way we can just relax and focus on bonding as a new family of seven which I love. It’s very helpful that they consider all of those things.
I have this beautiful, specific birth in my heart and it’s been that way for a very long time. I deeply believe that God will give me my dream birth and I will remain faithful about that. After all, 5th times a charm — right? Ha!
Note: We do have specific back up plans too. From baby sitters lined up to hospital bags being packed (My next blog will be a ‘What’s in my diaper bag’ post but I’ll also do a ‘what’s in my hospital bag’ one soon), we know that birth is unpredictable and though my faith is strong — I’m not unaware of the possibilities. Anything can happen. I could risk out today and have the baby now or I could risk out last minute in our home during labor and need rushed to the hospital. He could be born in the middle of the day and not at night. He could come before the midwives get here. It could be a super painful labor and I could want my kids to go to my grandma’s house. I could be too miserable for guests after he’s born. We definitely have in mind that it’ll be winter time so weather and sickness is an issue. For that reason, guest allowance will be strict and limited to our parents and grand parents. We could have the perfect home birth but he could have issues breathing or I could hemorrhage and need to rush to the hospital post delivery. So many things could come up. We know that.
***My top favorite birth affirmations:
Pain with a purpose!
It’s not just pain, it’s progress!
It’s not pain, it’s power!
Every contraction gets me one step closer to meeting my baby!
This will not last forever!
The only way out, is through!
My baby is coming!
Where the mind goes, the body follows!
Laugh, sing, dance, glow — let the oxytocin flow!
My baby and I are working together!
I trust my instincts!
I am relaxed and calm!
My baby will be born at the perfect time!
I am blessed to carry this baby!
Breathing in I feel strong, breathing out I let go!
You are stronger than you think!
Lastly my favorite one, I am prepared to calmly meet whatever path this birth takes.
Post a Comment