Jealousy: The Stealer of Joy

Today I had a close friend tell me that she stalked my social media because she was jealous of my life. Some people would have taken it as a compliment but I did not. It made me sad and just want to hug her. Because she's a good friend and I'm brutally honest this is the basic summary of my response to her...

Jealousy is self sabotage. It'll steal your happiness if you let it. I see it everyday whether it's on social media, a friend in your life, or something you yourself has issues with. It's everywhere and it's something that everyone has struggled with to some degree including myself but it's the people who let it consume them that break my heart. The people who throw away their time worried about the things that they don't have or the people who throw away friendships over it. 

Here's the thing, you can't be a genuinely happy person if jealousy drives you. If you're never content with the life or the things that you have because you want what someone else has that's awful. We all strive for better at some point. We all have the same wants as someone else in the world. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about losing friends because they are jealous of you or you are jealous of them. I'm talking about obsessing over what someone else has whether it's a guy or a car or even maybe their whole life. You can't live that way. You have to be happy with the life and the things that you have. Don't let bitterness destroy you. It's okay to want things. It's okay to strive for those wants. It's okay to be like someone else. Being alike is what makes the best of friendships. But don't let jealousy ruin you. Be a good person. Be a good friend. Be a good mom and wife. Those are the things that can't be boughten. Those are the things to focus on. Those are the things totally in your control. Be happy for people who have things that you want. Be encouraging. Be the light in someone's bad day. That's what matters. That's what makes you truly happy. That's what makes you special.  

Dear friends of mine;

If you get the new car that I wanted, I'm happy for you.

If you have twins like I've lost twice now, I'm happy for you. 

If you got to have a water birth at the birth center unlike me, I'm happy for you. 

If you have a perfect body, I'm happy for you. 

If you're thrilled in your less than perfect mom bod, I'm happy for you.

If you get to have as many kids as you want like I'd love to get to do, I'm happy for you.

If you get to build your dream home or remodel your current home to make it your dream home, I'm happy for you. 

If you get to travel the world like I'd love to do, I'm happy for you. 

If you win the lottery, I'm happy for you (and hope that you'll share with me ha) 

I'm kind of kidding about the sharing thing. Kinda. 

My point is that although you have things that I want, I AM HAPPY FOR YOU! My day might come to have those things but even if it doesn't my life is full of more blessings than I ever deserved. I wouldn't be bitter about what I don't have when I am unexplainably grateful for all that I do have. You should be too.