One thing that we all know about life is that people come and go. Someone that you were the closest to at one point, becomes a stranger. Someone that was a stranger, becomes a friend. Someone that you thought you could trust with anything, you couldn't trust at all. Someone that you thought you wouldn't get along with, ended up being your kind of person. Our requirements for friends changes as we mature. When you're young you settle for good times and hang out buddies. When you're older you want quality traits in a person that you spend your time with. When you're a parent you want friends that your kids can look up to and learn from. My group of friends has changed dramatically. Sure, I still have a handful of the friends that I did as a child and in high school but in my mom life I've found many new friends that I appreciate so much. Women who are at the same place in life as me. Women who I can totally relate to. Women whose families come first. Women who have drinks over potty training discussions. (Yes, my best friend Lauren and I have seriously sat at a restaurant drinking mixed drinks while talking about potty training and cloth diapering ha.) Women who still enjoy girls nights but want to be home to their family at a decent hour. Women whose girls nights are usually dinner and a movie or even a night in watching the kids play while you snack on homemade chips and salsa. Women who you can complain to about your husband and know that they aren't judging you because they've felt the same exact way. Women who don't get butt hurt if it takes you a week to reply to their text because they know how crazy a moms mind is and how busy you are. Women who check on you and your kids when someone is sick. Women who don't care if your house is dirty because they know the struggle. Women who randomly drop by because they know that you're always at home with your kids and they wanted some adult interaction. Women who you can ask for mothering advice and not feel like they think less of you because God forbid you not know it all as a mom. Women who are the kind of friend/person that you are.
I've been burned a lot by girls. I'm the type of friend who is all in and expects the same loyalty. I don't need people in my life that I can't trust and sadly it's taken me years before to find out what someone was really like but those people taught me great lessons. They have taught me to be the kind of friend that I'd want someone to be to me. They have taught me that people will come and go but the people who matter will always stay. They have taught me that some of the best people that you'll ever meet might be the ones that you never expected. They have taught me that sometimes the friend that you've known the shortest amount of time might end up being the one that you share the deepest bond with.
Be open to new journeys. Be open to new friends. Be open to surprises. Guard your heart but don't let the fear of getting burned keep you from giving people a chance.
And remember that life isn't a competition. If you find someone just like you, cherish that. Don't see it as a threat. I've been guilty of feeling this way. Of feeling like someone who had a life very similar to mine was someone trying to compete with me or 'copy' me but with time I have learned that it isn't like that. If anything it's a blessing to have someone out there so much like you because believe it or not it can be hard to find someone who has a ton in common with me that I also actually get along with personality wise. I think that's why I felt put off by it. Because it's so rare. I mean, I'm a stay at home mom with soon to be 4 kids ages 5 and under. I didn't get stuck in this life, I begged God for it. I love being a mom despite the craziness and I truly enjoy it. I enjoy cloth diapering and making my own baby food. I enjoy birthday party throwing, arts and crafts time, home school lessons, chores and chart making, learning new things about children's safety, foster parenting, going over board on holiday decor, making fun snacks with faces, ect. I'm a small town girl who lives on a farm with my onry tribe and a million pets. People in the same place in life as me or who feel like I do about momming just aren't common. Good working mom friends with 2.0 kids aren't too hard to find and I adore my working ladies who think two kids is too much. I still have plenty in common with them. But if I find a mom like me who wants 10 kids and has a bomb personality that's like finding a freaking unicorn. I shouldn't of ever seen those girls as anything but an opportunity to make a life long friend.
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